the outside is still..  quiet.  dreamlike.  but the further inside i go, particles are vibrating faster and faster.  spinning around each other, regrouping.. re-interpreting.

life looks the same.  but it's been torn apart at the seams..  and the last flakes of my shredded flesh are drifting off in the whirlwind;  starting to pool at the edge of a new path.  like reincarnation, the pheonix..  the seconds before new life takes flight.

i'm weeping for the pieces of me that are to be left behind.  not from sadness, but from mere separation anxiety.  even knowing they are unecassary for the future, i always cry over death...  nor do i know yet what shape the future will take.

i just know it will be better..

so i'll wimper and twitch in my chrysalis..  hiding from all those prying eyes.  healing.  until i am ready to break free.  until it's time to take the next step.

atlas

i've been caustic of the general prospectus since the scorp season began, but neptune is really carving out a secret moment right now... thoughts that seem to have no origin are bubbling everywhere

he pictures me in a small bright apartment with a white kitchen, where i can cook to my hearts content

my consciousness is lost in a snow cloud of presuppositions

intuitive response is elemental to the survival of everything

something tells me to run

but something else screams that i shan't

there is a t-square happening

mars in leo/mercury, venus in scoprio/neptune and chiron stradling the aqua-piscean cusp

mars in leo is compulsory, demanding, 

\\

mercury and venus paired up in scorpio are like the sexual beast emerging from his dark and hidden caves.. committed to expressing all claims in a responsible and prospective manner

//

netune diludes,, expands,, reveals the unseen'

with chiron; the bearor of all deepest pain is also the beneficial prospects achieved by instructing the world of criteria for amending said anguish

glamour

lust

perversion

profession

becasue i think this is what i need to do to absolve the mistakes i cannot remember